VOYAGE DE LA VIE :D

yesterday went to resort world to watch, and very funny things is that i mix resort world and universal studios. *Laugh. thanks you to my aunt for the free tickets. the show is about journey of life, if got money i will ask my friends to go along. it is really a nice show love it, but got some of the part i am scare of it. but overall i enjoy myself. lucky i got jeremy beside me to rely on it. but times really flies very fast whenever i am with him. abit sad, but never mind i am just looking forward for my wedding. *Laugh. i think i am just thinking far but no choice i just only want to faster make a family with jeremy. i think i am really crazy over him. OMG ! help me ! but now need to work earn money and then can had marry. i think i must think of studies first, everything will work hard for future. never the less, really fall deeply in love with jeremy. will never let go of my hand unless he let go. but sometime we quarrel but he really cares for me, sometime i think i still like kid toward him. because i think i need alot of love even though he had given me that much already. i just feel greedy will god punish me ? but never mind i will just be happy, and wait for him to ORD !

21 days :D

yeah ! will be seeing in 2days time. booking out of camp soon, really miss him badly. but no choice must understand NS is all guys need to do. so wait, now a days time quite slow but is okay. but when school started i will make myself busy and focus on my study. but i think most of the time will be thinking of you and cannot concentrate  HOW ? seriously i need to wake up, must study hard cannot always miss you. must work hard for my future cannot lose to you. so i must think of a way that i can focus by not thinking of you. never mind i not going to think now, will wait for this men jeremy ong bee teck to help me solve this problem. he confirm got his own way to make me focus on my study. if not i will kill he definitely. *just kidding. is like normally i always say that don't always meet then i will not miss him when he go NS. but i forget is that everyday he will message me or call as and when he like or i like. but now is like got time, that why i will feel bored so always find stupid things to do. feel like keep sleep and sleep and sleep. but scare that school start i will die because use to sleeping no mood for lesson. another problem again. why do i have so many problem. i not complaint or what is just that don't have you in school i really will bored to death. unless i got mix with a group of friends like nitec i think that one will not be a problem. but i still don't how my friend will ended up be like how ? is like still got 1months and 1 day to go. i just can't wait to see what kind of classmate i will get and for lecturer i not that worry. because most of the lecturer i know, but most of them should be nitec teacher not higher nitec one. anyway i just want to have a good result and then i can set a goal for myself. miss you jeremy, love you so much. see you soon :D

best friend :D

today went out with priya to eat lunch, went to eat mad jack. but sad is that we forget to take picture. never mind next time can go take. after that she came to my house to settle her resume to send for working. because she have graduated and looking for 1 year full time job and then go study poly, but the problem is that she don't know what course she want to study. there are plenty of choice for her but the problem is that she is confuse. that is her character, after hearing about her relationship today i realise that she is a good girlfriend but the problem is that she choice to keep everything to herself then telling people. she only can express her feeling towards people is through texting or her blog. that is where she got express her feeling. this is also the guy fault, he suppose to go understand her well but he choice not too. and make himself so confuse and think that she is so complicated to understand at all. she is actually not difficult to understand her is just that he don't spend more time with her and try to understand. i know sometime things that she need to be angry she is not but not she want is just only happy and peaceful life. but alot of people don't really know about this. i just only can say that if who ever guy that can untie her heart and understand her well that will definitely last long. she really very nice girl but she really keep everything to herself. i also cannot untie her heart but the only things that i can do now is that make her happy and see what i can help her. temporary is that she can do now is to work first, study then see what next. but i really hope that she can have a guy that cares for her and understand her, she will be more then happy that she don't have to quarrel with the guy at all. she just only want a simple life and be happy. nothing much, as long as she is happy. to me she is really a good friend to me, whenever i am sad or what she will be a very good listening ear and really very patience to hear whatever things that have happen. she cannot give any advice but she is good in a way that you need her she will be by your side support you. this is like in my life have this kind of friend. not like tracy she have been like my sister for about 2 to 3 years but she seem to not understand me at all. she just think that everything she do is correct and not reflecting. same goes to sharon is seem like no different so i choice to hate her is correct. even though she really a very potential girl but always use in a wrong way. i don't always say people, i know where i am. either than that the only problem is that i don't know what i want in future that all. the rest of things is that whatever i can do now i will try my best to do, than see what can i do next. even though sometime abit late, but i rather take slowly step by step. since i am scare to become a failure and fall down. because to me is one i fall down from there i will have no courage to move on. that why whatever do i need to do research so that i will not walk the wrong patch. that why people say cherish whatever you have rather than forcing yourself so much on something that you don't really like.

Decision (+)

why do people need to make decision ? i don't really like. because whatever decision i want or just simply say that whatever dream i want it. it always either i got illness or i need to ask help from teacher that i not comfortable with it. but jeremy told me before that i need to learn to face different kind of people, learn to communicate with people that are not familiar. but i don't even know what i want in future. i want to learn business studies but the problem is that i don't even have the chance. if i want now also no time already. now the only things is that i need to prepare whatever i have now. i know people will just thinks that why i never help myself or by now i should know what i want to work in future. to me is that i plan to work as a admin work. but if work too long i think nothing special, really don't know what i want. anyone can help me ? i think mr daniel is right, no one can help me only myself. seriously i really don't know what i want. i think study first, maybe i think i will be an engineer ? never know, so i need to build my confident and really be a different of me. i will do my best, study hard first then play hard. JYJY !

small quarrel with him :(

today went to do OCBC cycle singapore volunteer, went there to do usher. really damn sianz but overall really enjoy myself because with a group of friends that is sister to me. but yesterday weather is really bad first the sun after that rain then sun again. wonder people can take it until like this will not fall sick is unbelievable. have some quarrel with jeremy just because of never accompany him, he had grow fat. because his sergeant told them that if they have gain weight next week cannot come out then he is like so frustrated and say i don't understand how he feel. okay, i don't understand how he feel because i am outside not training NS and don't have the kind of stress that he have in NS. i should not go do volunteer right ? no time for him, is it my fault ? if it is my fault i am very sorry about it. i will not do it next time, try to put myself in your shoe and not because of small things quarrel with you. because you got more things to do i don't want our relationship to be part of your things. i want to have secure in NS. when my NDP training going to start i will tell you about the date and time so maybe you can make some arrangement to your schedule. because i just want to do my young adult leader role this year the active one and not going to attend anymore young adult leader things anymore. hope things will change to a better one.

miserable (!)

today staying at home the whole, supposedly i meeting heartheart. then in the morning my mum ask me whether can don't go out today, i was like why. then she tell me that 3uncle is coming to my house then i was like what the hell. she say is safe to stay at home then go out, if not scare later he keep say about my relationship after that my stepfather will confirm get piss off. so i just stay at home, the worse things is that i never spare a thought for heartheart. no matter how many sorry i say nothing will change the fact. if he want to get angry with me, i will just let it be. since he going to NS. at first i want to try not let him be upset before he go in. but i had done it, nothing can change the fact just only can face it. whenever he say that i destroy his plan it make feel very guilty, don't know what to do then will make you happy. seriously i really don't want this to happen, i am just like a idiot that only make you angry upset but not happy. i simply just very tired, want to give myself a break. there are alot of things happening now a days, i really very confuse and want to really put down everything to leave a simple life. i know that this kind of life will not happen on my life. my life there are plenty of challenging part to face it and overcome it. it seem like i cannot do anything to life but can choice my own future. i don't know why life must stay until so miserable but i tell myself i will learn to face the reality and stop being childish. i really stop it and reflect on myself about it, i am tired. just want to stop everything and end my life. but i tell myself if i just end my life just meaningless, i really a jerk. because i will hurt alot of people first my family, heartheart and those people that care about me. that the reason that i be independent for so long until i met jeremy. but it seem like after met him my life still no change because i still need to face the reality on how people look at my boyfriend. actually i cannot don't care how people say about him but if people keep say bad things about us i will confirm nasty to those people and straight ignore the person. even though how hard my path will be like i will definitely need to continue to walk until i found my goal/achievement that i want. i need to work for the sack of my future, then i can give happiness to people around me. i don't want to disappoint those people that care for me, i want to show them that even though i not that smart but at least i know what i want in the future and i want to make my family to proud of me rather than they disappoint on me. so from now i need to plan well for my future, firstly need to work to earn some income while now school have not start. when school start need to work hard score well and go poly. JIAYOU JIAYOU (Y!)